Ok, I promised pictures, this is me after working out

So I promised I'd post more pics of myself since I enjoy that most on all of YOUR blogs....so here's one of me from last night after I ate that cup of ice cream:

Ok, that's really my daughter I caught on camera eating ice cream.

But this really is me - on the couch catching up on reading all your blogs.  Took pic with my new phone - I promise I'm not normally that shade of grey/blue!  I worked out today - ran better than I've been able to so far at 5.0 mph - which is a good stride for me, a person of 5'4".  Calories in: 1296.  Lots of water.  Thank you to everyone for the lovely words of encouragement - I really needed that today.  (((hugs))) to all of you!

Still 204....

Its frustrating to do all of what I believe are the right things and not see that scale move.  I did look back over my weight loss tracker and I weighed 206 exactly 7 days prior to this past Sat/Sun.  So, I could say that I lost 2 lbs in one week.  I had set the goal at 203.5 b/c I'd also weighed 205.5 that same week I'd recorded 206.  I guess I'm trying to encourage myself to replace the disappointment.  I ate fine yesterday, I also got my butt on the treadmill and walked on an incline for 45mins.  I really didn't want to do it, it was 7pm and I made my kids wait 45 mins to color easter eggs so I could get it done.  I didn't feel like pushing myself b/c I'm disappointed, but I know I can't give up on the exercise.  So I gave myself permission to walk instead as long as I did something.  Today, I'll go to the gym at lunch and work on the elliptical instead of running also.
Last night, I ate a cup of ice cream.  I didn't eat much for dinner and I was frustrated with myself and recognized that I was breaking down and allowing myself to eat what I shouldn't.  Its the disappointment that I'm feeling that led me to that.  It was after that, that I decided to get on the treadmill.  I don't want to give in and give up. 
I'll eat right today, I'm drinking much more water than I was, and do this for another week.  Easter will be hard with all the chocolate around but I will be accountable.  I plan to work out 5x this week again and we'll see what happens.  Just to get to 203 would be wonderful.  Why does my body want to hang on to this weight?  What is wrong with me??  If I was reading this on someone else's blog I might think - that person isn't reallly eating 1000-1200 calories or not exercising perhaps at the right intensity.  I AM and that's the frustrating part b/c I know I am.  I also know I've lost weight this way before just a couple of months ago so why isn't it working now?
Ok, rant over.  Moving on.  Pissed off, but moving on.....

Half pound from my goal today!

I took Jennr's advice, and drank, drank, drank water yesterday.  I ate well, had a dozen steamed shrimp and half a boild potato at dinner.  For lunch I had some salmon and sauteed spinach.  Did well eating - and woke up today to the scale telling me 204.  So, I'm a half pound off, which sucks.  I only tried to lose 2 lbs this week and did all I was supposed to - exercise and eating were on point!  So while I am a little disappointed, I have to be happy weighing less than I did a week ago.  And even less than I was 2 weeks ago.  I am actually the lowest point since being banded so if I can move forward - and get below 200 - that's what I'm going to focus on.  Once I get there, I'll re-evaluate and figure out how to get to the next point.
I did go to Walmart and purchase the one cup containers by Ziploc to portion control my lunches this week.  I'd been using 2 cup containers and maybe that will help some as well.  I've got salmon and turkey slices ready to go.  I've also made up some breakfast snack bags - filled with multi grain cherios, walnuts and fruit bits that I can eat in the car on the way to work or just save for an afternoon snack if I don't want to eat breakfast.  I also know I need to up the potassium in my diet so I've got bananas for breakfast or snack as well.  So, I'm just trying to say, I'm prepared this week!
Hope you all have a wonderful rest of your Sunday - what's left of it! 

Phooey!

I didn't work out yesteday (I've completed four 45m workouts so far this week) and I've done very well with eating (1200 or less cals).  Yesterday, I got up to weigh myself and it said 205! UGH!  I had chicken soup yesterday, so I know the sodium caused that so I wrote it off.  Today, I get up at 4am (kids keep waking us up as they try to get in our bed again!) and I weighed 206!  Got up at 6:30am, I weigh 205 after using the restroom.  That SUCKS!  I do know that I'm doing the right thing - been working out and eating right for 2 weeks without cheating.  *sigh* I'm not having a good morning b/c I'm ticked off that I won't make my 203.5 goal by tomorrow morning. PHOOOEEEY! (that's the clean version).
OK, so enough about that.  I'm just going to pretend it didn't happen and keep doing the right things.  It just takes so LOOOONNGGGG!  Ok, I really am done........for now.
I was on the computer for hours last night trying to plan a trip to Disney/SeaWorld for my family in May.  We could go in April - airfare through Southwest is $210 each in either month.  Not sure if any of you Floridian natives have any inside recommendations - we're going to stay a week and do all the parks.  Any tips - for those of you have gone would be greatly appreicated as well.  What to avoid, what not to miss, etc.  Thanks!

Tonight is my husband's last race of the season.  I'm going to drop my daughter off at my MIL and take my son to the last race.  I'm glad its over but I know he's going to miss it.  He had a lot of fun doing it and I'm glad he has a hobby he enjoys.  He's done if for about 5 years.  I'm also glad I don't have to be a big part of it as its just not my thing.  And I think every married couple needs time to do things they enjoy - even by themselves.  I think its good to have that separation sometimes.  I'm going to meet my mom b/c she wants to go and we are going to take my son to Joe's Crab Shack.  Its one of his favorite restaurants.
Last night I wanted to sit, knit, and sip.  That means enjoy a little peace, knit with some cashmere yarn I recently bought, and sip a smooth, rich Clois Du Bois!  I even took a picture of my intentions:

Did it happen?  Nope.  My son had another boy sleep over, so you can imagine the noise and energy of two 8 year old boys giggling and playing all around the house last night.
DH took both kids to my son's baseball game this morning so I have 2 whole hours to myself!  Woot!  First priority is to post here, 2nd - catch up on all your awesome blogs, 3rd - go for a quick run this morning while I still can.  Maybe that pesky 1.5 pounds will shake off my butt as I'm jogging today - there really is a whole lotta shakin' goin' on when I jog...soooo. its possible! right?!
Have a wonderful day girls!  I can't wait to read your blogs!!!!

Shhhhh......I don't want to jinx it!

I'm not saying this out loud ....but I will type it really quick.....I woke up this morning, hopped on the scale and it said 203.5!!  That's a full 1lb overnight!  Now, I fully realize that its water weight.  But that's my Sat or Sunday goal realized TODAY on the scale!  2 days early!  I know tomorrow the scale will probably say 204 but it gives me hope that I'll realize my weekend goal to make it to 203.5!  And that it might stick !  Ok...shhhhh....lets all just be quiet and just hope the scale doesn't move tonight (unless, of course, it chooses to go down again!).  I'm getting ready to walk out the door now, and go for a 45 mins walk/run.  I'm at about 650 cals for the day and plan to finish again around 1000 calories eaten.  If I burn about 300 cals walking - that will put me at a -1100 cal or so for the day which is my target.  (1900 BMR+ 300 cals burned = 2200 cal daily expenditure.  2200-1000 calories eaten= -1200 calorie deficit).  That deficit for the next 3 days means I should lose another 1 lb over the next 3-4 day period.  I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed!

Lost another half pound! I might make my week's goal!

Ok, so I'm probably a little dehydrated from not drinking enough water, but the scale DID say 204.5 this morning!!!  That's a whole pound down in 3 days!  Caloriecount.com and nikeplus.com are helping me to stay accountable to myself.  I worked out again today and was able to turn up the running pace to 4.5 and I ran for a total of 20 mins.  I'm doing intervals of 5 mins running with 2-5 min walking.  I keep that up for 45 mins and am able to cover about 3.2mi total.  I did really great yesterday, food-wise, then I decided to put that natural honey I got from a local farmer on top, and couldn't belive that about 4T had 280 calories!!!  UGH!  I went from about 1100 cals total yesterday to 1380 just like that!  Those are the extra calories I just would not have even thought about nor considered at all when I just eat without tracking calories!
I've also decided/realized that I don't ever post pictures of myself.  And that is truly what I enjoy the most on all of your blogs out there that I read.  And you guys also elevate that to VLOGS - I love it!  So,  I'm going to start posting more pics of myself.  I'll test out the phone on my camera - we'll see how that goes!
As long as I stay on track, I'm hoping to lose another full pound to bring me to 203.5 by Sunday.  At first, I thought I'd make it by SAT, but since that's only 3 days away, I'm probably pushing it to expect another full pound loss in the next 3 days.
I'm thinking a lot about what I'm going to wear to my full family event - that's taking place next Saturday for Easter.  I don't see all of my extended family except for marriages, births, deaths, etc.  That works out to once every 2 years or so.  I am the heaviest of everyone in my family.  Seriously, out of all my 4 Aunts, 6 Uncles, 3 siblings, 15 cousins -  none are overweight except for me.  (At least that is true on my Mom's side of the family).  My Dad, who died some years ago, was also always fit and never overweight - even as a middle aged person!  My mom is 5'6" and weighs probably 120lbs at 61.  Anyway - I want to look good at this even where tons of pictures will document everyone's families, how much kids are growing, who is aging well and who isn't! LOL.  Of course, I wish I weighed less than I do right now.  I wish I lost weight at the pace of everyone else out there in blogland  - but I've learned that since I waited so long for my first fill and because I didn't exercise like everyone else - that's why I'm where I am.  I'm glad I know now how to do it - it just still surprises me how hard it still is.  Its hard to not enjoy all the food I love.  Yes, hunger has subsided, but its hard to watch carefully what I eat when you're craving something like chocolate. :)   And to make yourself work out 5x per week.  Even though we have the band, we still have to do those things.  I realize that I live with less restriction than some people choose to.  I also respect that it is a very personal choice also.  And everyone's journey is personal to them.  I just really need to get this going and break into the next level!  199 is only 5 lbs away right now.  So close and yet seems so intangible!  What does it feel like to weigh 190?  To weigh 180?  I just cannot imagine how great that feels and I'm going to take Amy's advice and live in the MOMENT.  So all y'all skinny butts out there below 200 - please live in YOUR moment and realize what an accomplished place you're in!  I'll be joining you soon!

Another half pound! I'll take it!

Thanks to everyone for the suggestions about the salad!  I stuck with it, finished it, and didn't do badly food-wise for the rest of the day!  I also got a run in (3.2 mi) in 45mins.  I can already tell that I can run longer - and it feels better - after only these 3 weeks.   I got on the scale today and lost .5 !  I just hope it stays off and doesn't just bounce back up tomorrow.  I feel like if I don't work out today - it could bounce back up there, you know?  You know how you just bounce around up one day by a pound, down the next by a half, up the next day by a half, down the next day by a pound to end up right where you started?  I want to avoid that!  My goal is to be at 203.5 by Sat or Sunday.   I didn't take a lunch today and so I missed a workout during the lunch hour.  Its 7:15pm already, just got home, and I need to find a way to work it in!! 

Why is it so hard to eat a salad?

I've come home from work - to work from home - and made myself a wonderful salad: lettuce, tomato, cukes, red onion, kalamata olives, feta cheese, artichoke hearts and some wonderful greek dressing.  2 bites and I'm having a hard time eating it.  Why is it hard to eat the healthy stuff and yet so easy to eat 3 chocolate chip cookies?  The salad isn't that fibrous - so it shouldn't be a big problem.  But, I swear, when you're really hungry - and trying to eat the right stuff to boot -  it can be so difficult to avoid eating all the stuff your band won't blink an eye at and take right in!  The cheetos, chocolate chip cookies, cheese, ice cream, all the bad stuff doesn't phase my band one bit!  But the healthy stuff, ugh, its slow going.  Well, I'm not going to give in, but its frustrating to be hungry but unable to eat fast enough.

Ok, enough about that.  Target has some really cute cardigans - if anyone wants some "Spring" in their wardrobe - check these out on sale this week.  I bought a kelly green one and a white one yesterday.  They're normally 24.99 and great quality.   I'm really trying to break out of my black, cream, charcoal, eggplant rotation in my wardrobe.  So drab!  I need to buy some bright stuff!  And, no, that's not me in the picture!
I'm going to stay on track this week eating-wise.  And I'm also going to stay on track with running/walking.  I'm loving the Nike plus sensor - it talks to you throughout the workout - and I need that kind of motivation to let me know how much longer I have until I can stop! Now if I can only find the "Hugh Jackman" voice and have him telling me how much longer I have to go, I'll REALLY be motivated!  *sigh*  Ok, back to reality.....I also like uploading the data and tracking it online.  This new sensor allows more data to upload so I have much more detail than I did with just the built in pedometer and uploads in my nano.  (Yikes, that sounded a little dirty)  Sooooo - if I do all I have planned eating-wise and exercise-wise, it should mean a 2 lbs loss this week.  That would put me at 203.5 by this Saturday.  I'm really wanting that to happen.  So, its going to be what keeps me going and on track this week.  I hope I'm not setting myself up for disappointment.  This week makes the 3rd week of consistently working out - so I'm going to reward myself with a massage.  I'm also fighting off a cold - so I hope that doesn't impede all my great plans this week!

I'm still sitting here picking at this salad!  Its probably going to take me 45 mins to eat it.  Its 2 cups of salad and I realize we should only be eating 1 cup at a meal - do you think I'm doing this wrong?  Should I cut my portions down to one cup?   I eat about one and a half cups if its protien and cooked vegetables.  As long as I'm 900-1200 calories, it shouldn't matter, right?
Well, have a great day everyone!!

This works!

Hopped on the scale and lost another pound.  YAY!  So glad the 2 weeks of working out and eating the way I'm supposed to is rewarding me on the scale.  I'm so happy to regain control again!
I think I'm just a slow 'self-corrector.'  What I mean by self-correction is that everyone goes off track and then have to re-direct their behaviors to get themselves back on their exercise plan or back on their eating plan.  Most people self-correct in eating or working out habits in less than 24 hours.  Some people self-correct and get back on track within the week.  Me?  I think I'm a sloooow self corrector and that's what I'm going to focus on.  If I miss a day off plan, I'm going to self-correct the next day.  This is the only way I'm going to make this work.  Losing focus b/c of work or other life stresses for months at a time just isn't getting me where I want to go.  So there you have it!  The plan.

Yesterday I bought the nike adapter that attaches to your shoe and tracks your running workouts.  It cost $29 and tracks your work out so that you can upload them to nike plus website and track your progress.  I am doing that now with my ipod nano - its internal pedometer tracks my steps, converts them into calories burned based the stored height and weight I entered into it.  Then I connect my ipod to itunes and it automatically uploads the data to their website and tracks how I'm doing.  You can set goals, etc.  But it appears that the nike adapter I bought will upload more data than just steps/calories so I'm going to try it.  I'll let you guys know how it goes.
Its 8:15am, I'm realllly hungry even though I finished yesterday at around 1150 calories.  I realllly wanted to eat peanut butter and something substantial last night - but I resisted and ate greek yogurt with honey.  By tracking my calories on caloriecount.com I resisted b/c I didn't want to go that far over on my daily intake.  So that is the value in tracking my calories there.  Its changing my behavior! :)  I know on the site I can see the deficit between what I'm burning and what I'm eating and it allows me to calculate exactly when I should be losing a pound (-3500 cals) which at the rate I'm eating and burning - I hit that 3500 deficit about every 3-4 days.  Some days I get to a 1000 cal deficit, another day I'm only 800 cal deficit which equates to about a pound loss every 3-4 days, which equates to a 2 lbs loss per week.  Hello????  Obvious, isn't it?  For some reason, I'm really enjoying the tracking of it.  Makes it seem tangible - the loss of weight vs. just a theoretical guessing game.
I know I'm going to need a fill by the time I get into the 190's.  I'm hungry a lot - I am forcing myself to stop eating vs. the band stopping me.  Do you all feel that the band stops the hunger pangs or does the fill force you to eat less - you can't fit anymore in without getting stuck?  Is there a simple answer to that?  I'm thinking its individual to each person -some get tighter fill to keep them from eating more than the pouch in their stomach allows others may be more loose but the hunger isn't as great?  Hmmmm.  I don't like that feeling of not being able to eat much - I feel deprived and don't feel satiated.  I like the lack of hunger we feel after fills - the not thinking about it.  The sense that this is what 'normal' people feel like - not obsessed with thinking about food all day long.
I will stop babbling - I'm thinking I'll get to 203 by next Friday, 201 the week after that, and 199 in 3 weeks.  I'm focused on that micro-goal for now!

Real quick

Hey....real quick.....I'm home late, its 10pm here on the East coast, so I gotta post quick.  I knew it would be a long day b/c I was off they last two days and it was!  But that's not what I want to talk about.  I wanted to tell you guys that I'm doing really well food-wise and I am so proud of myself!  I couldn't didn't make working out happen today, but that's ok, b/c I'm just going to do it tomorrow and SAT and that will make 5 days of working out this week!  Yippiee ki-yay!  That will be 2 full weeks of working out 5x like I should!  I am getting stronger already and am already less winded & less ache-y (how do you spell that?? I don't have time to look it up - and btw has anyone figured out how to do spell check on blogger yet??) 
Anyway - just wanted to express my personal excitement because I know if I do all the right things, I'm going to get rolling again on the weight loss!  I can't wait to look like all you skinny minnie's out there! Yes CARA, I saw your collar bones in that VLOG....you hot momma...... and I'm jealous!  :)

Concert was AWESOME & I stayed on track!

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Woke up this morning, hopped on the scale and I'd lost a pound!  So the exercise and eating right thing is working - go figure!
We got home last night at about 3am, I fell into bed and had to get up at 7am to get the kids off.  That done, I came back home and fell asleep for a couple of hours.  I woke up around 11am b/c husband called 3x - ugh!  And when I answered he said he didn't think I'd be sleeping. HELLO??!!  Anyway, it felt good to sleep a little bit more of the fatigue headache off. :)
The concert was fabulous!  And our seats were awesome!  I also was very proud of staying on track yesterday - not only making myself work out on the treadmill for 40mins before we left (and I was able to run jog for 15 mins of it).  We had a blast at dinner and I ordered the sirloin topped salad and ate very little of it.  I also didn't snack during the drive which was good.   We actually stopped at the restaurant where my ex-boyfried (of 5 yrs before hubby) manages.  He wasn't there that day - which is fine by me.  But when we were there I thought a lot about what he would think if he saw me.  He's one of the people I'd like to notice once I do lose the weight - how good I look!  Not for any other reason but I think he things I let things go after him.  And he was very 'looks' conscious - he groomed himself more than I did!  Anyway, he's a good guy - just a little hung up back then and is still a little bit too hung up on materialistic things and 'looks.'  So, I'd love to show him I've not let myself go and make him sorry for cheating on me way back then which broke up our relationship.  That's all!  Needless to say, I was happy he wasn't there - we went b/c my family was very close to him back then and they are still in touch with the rest of his family - so my sister really wanted to see him b/c she hadn't seen him in so long.  His sister does my family's hair on a regular basis.   
I will get there - I just need to stick to the rules of regular exercise and eating the right things.  I just realized that for lunch I had some Great Grains cereal - only about a cup - but gosh it was 248 cals!  I'm hungry now so since I'm already at 650 cals for the day I was looking for something lower in calories.   I grabbed a new favorite - I keep canned peaches (made with splenda) in the fridge!  They're very cold when they come out and they're only about 100 calories for the entire can.  A sweet treat that's not a lot of calories.  I don't plan on working out today - I'm going to give myself a rest day this week and resume tomorrow.  My muscles are very sore still from dancing for 3 hours last night! LOL.  I also still have a headache from the lack of sleep.  I wish I were more like other people (like my husband) who can go without much sleep and be fine.  Not me - a lack of sleep really affects me! 
Well have a great day - I'm back to work tomrrow and it will be crazy since I have to catch up on 2 days off from work.  But I'll be bringing my work out gear!!!! :)

Its 11am and I'm hungry...

I've had coffee and a half a banana. I've recorded it. I'm hungry but I don't want to blow it today.  I find if I eat less during the day - its harder to eat a larger dinner.   If I eat more during the day, I'm able to eat much more for dinner.  Since I am going out to dinner before the concert tonight and I don't want to screw up today.  I have to leave in 2 hours and I'm going to make myself work out for 45 mins, take a shower, do my hair and make-up, and plan my outfit for tonight.  I also have to clean my car since I'm driving everyone to the concert. 
Not sure where we'll end up for dinner but I am committed to making the right choices today.  I don't feel good about how I look today - but perhaps if I jump on the treamill - work out a little which I'm noticing makes me feel stronger mentally - it will curb my hunger and make me feel better.

This constant rain isn't helping either with the moods.  I need some sunshine!!!  See you all tomorrow - hope you have a WONDERFUL Tuesday!

Off to a great week!

I worked out today!  And I kept my calories in check!  Not only that, I faithfully tracked my calories and work out on caloriecount.com AND I resisted the Dove chocolates in the cabinet! Woot!  I was surprised how much I went over my calories and consumed 1700 calories yesterday and I actually thought I was doing well.  Today is much better.  I was very impressed with the new updates on caloriecount since it now analyzes your day and gives you a very detailed readout on calories, nutrients, protein, fats (sat and unsat), cholesterol, fiber, calorie deficit vs. overage customized to you.  I'm surprised that I was low on some nutrients and fiber but met the protien.  It helps me to decide what to change and what to add into my diet tomorrow.
Something I am learning since I am eating the foods I'm supposed to - if I keep eating - and push past what i should be eating, my stomach lets me!  And the more I eat.....the more I can eat!  If I stop early on, it almost seems like the food doesn't get used to going through the band.  It feels tighter.  If I push it - and eat more than I really should - the band just seems to loosen up and let me!  If it stayed this way, it could be a good thing.  It would occasionally allow me to eat but restrict me most of the time.
Today, for example, I packed a tunafish sandwich.  I could only eat less than half before I worked out.   I know that's because I didn't eat breakfast - only coffee.  I ate the other half of the sandwich driving back to work after I worked out.  I was quite full - but satisfactorily full.  I had greek yogurt and a bananna still that I had packed that I couldn't eat.  No way.  Then tonight I had about 1 cup of chili.  Just right.  I feel good - satisfied.  (smile)

Tomorrow I'm leaving for Charlottesville, VA with 3 other girls (one is my sister) and we are going to see my boyfriend John Mayer!  Woohoooo!  We're going to drive home afterwards so I won't get home until about 3am.  Going to have to fuel up on the Sbux!  I can't wait!  I hope I'm able to sneak my camera in - its one of those with the detachable lens that most places won't let you bring into a concert.  I hope I have lots of great pictures to share!  And if you're wondering how I feel about his lastest screw up in the Playboy article - I think he was stupid for what he said.  Hopefully he learned something from it and grew up a little.  Sometimes you have to learn the hard way.  Well, I do still like him for all the other reasons I liked him before.  People say stupid things sometimes, no excuses, but I'm going to enjoy the concert tomorrow! :)   

Eating the right foods

This week I am going to work on the types of food that I eat.  I have been eating foods that are easy with the band and those almost always equate to high calorie foods.  It truly is amazing how the food that is the WORST for you is the easiest to eat and for the band to tolerate.  I have not been eating salads - I've been eating cheese, nacho cheese, refried beans, chips, salsa, ice cream.  But mostly cheesy things.  WHAT exactly was I thinking?  I have not been regularly eating vegetables - like steamed broccoli, greens, beans, etc.  I realized I have avoided them b/c they are hard to eat.  Since I have been consciously improving what I'm eating, I'm getting stuck a lot more.  Yuck-O!  Anyway, I am consciously counting my calories again and I am planning and concentrating on planning my meals.  That's what I'm supposed to do!  I usually lose control at work b/c I am always rushing - I don't eat breakfast before I leave b/c I'm so busy trying to get the kids ready - one on the bus and take the other one to the sitter.  I the rush to work, grab a cofffee and get the day going.  I don't eat until 10am - or I just plain forget until its noon and then I just eat lunch.  I go for what's considered a slider food - pastas, gravies, soup, cheesy things.  This past week, however, I brought a great salad, a turkey and swiss sandwich the next and you know what?  They were difficult to get down.  I was hungry, rushing yet again to gulp it down.  I realized that's why I never eat the way I'm supposed to b/c I DON'T ALLOW myself enough time to eat them.  It takes me about 45 mins to get the salad down.  About 30 to get the sandwich down.  Well - that's how its supposed to work!!    For lunch today, I ate about a cup of butter beans and potatoes - awesomely good leftovers from last night.  A very COZY lunch!  This is all I ate - I could have had more - but I stopped at this: 

I was catching up on everyone's blogs today and I was reading where one of you went to a nutritionist - and she stated you should be at 900 calories.  Gosh that seems so low - but I'm going to shoot for that b/c I the same height at 5'4".  I've gotten a week behind me of regular exercise - I'm going to keep that up too.  I feel good that I'm getting to place where I am back on track.  I just know I am.  I'm not going to fail at this.  I'm not going to let that happen so I'm going to do something about it.

I also just got a new phone - its a Droid which is Verizon's version of the iPhone.  I'm going to figure out how to subsribe to all your blogs and get updates.  I'm also able to use caloriecount.com on it.  I know many of you love thedailyplate.  I'm not sure which one is best or what the advantages are.  I just know I need to track my calories and I'd really like to be able to do it from my phone so I can update it throughout the day. 

On the craft front, I'm on the last sleeve on an Easter sweater I'm making my daughter.  I'm about half way done and soon I'll be able to sew it up and try it on her.  I think I'll actually make it by Easter!  Sweaters take a very very long time to make - especially when you have NO free time.  I'll share pics on her when its done - here's how it looks right now:

WHAT???????

SARAH!  WHAT??  ME???!!!  Thank you so much. 
I am finally catching up on some blogs and I JUST read this nomination from SARAH.  I can't believe it.  Really!  I've always seen blog awards on other people's blogs and thought they are a pretty cool thing and always deserved, which is why I am just....well....beside myself.  How cool!  I really appreciate it and so pleased that you find me remotely interesting!  You have not idea how I've needed something to boost me and I'm telling you - this has really done it for me.  As you know, I've been absent from blogging for a few weeks b/c I was just in a funk.  Well, funk no more! LOL.  I actually got my butt up and worked out yesterday and now this?  Way Cool!

And to take from Sarah, the rules: 
Thank the person who nominated you for the award;
Copy the award and post onto your blog;
Link to the blog of the person who nominated you;
Tell seven interesting things about yourself;
Nominate seven bloggers; and
Post links to the blogs of your nominees

Seven things about me:
1.   I work in a very technical field but I am really more of a creative person.  I have the opportunity to change all of that in the next year as I am accepting severance from my job in 2011, staying at home for 2 years to pretend I'm Martha Stewart, then pursuing my creative side instead of my technial management side for my career.
2.  I love MS Excel. I actually 'think' in EXCEL most days to solve problems and people always come to me to teach them and I love to show them cool tricks and what you can really do with that program. 
3.  I secretly wish I could get married again (to the same guy) on a beach in the Islands or Hawaii and this time feel more beautiful than I did the first time.  I was about 170 the first time and felt like a very overweight bride........I know! I'd be so happy to be there now!
4.  Like Sarah, I love to organize things but you'd never know it looking at my house.  I take vacation days off from work just so that I can clean my house because it makes me mentally overwhelmed when my house is wreck - which is 95% of the time.
5.  I don't always wash my face before I go to bed.......:(
6.  I really think I can dance.  I never dance in front of anyone - but I'm tellin'  ya - I've got rythm!  SWEAR!
7.  I make my own handmade soap.  I love making french lavendar, green tea, Oatmeal, Milk & Honey soap.  Its the best soap in the world to me with the most dense, thick lather.  I also make my own body cream - its very thick everyone asks me to make it - especially people who use tanning beds b/c they tell me they can't find anything that works better.   I love to make something that people really like - its really a great feeling to see them sniffing away and then asking me to make more!

My Seven Nominees (wow - this really IS hard! There are so many out there that are really fantastic - many of you already have Beautiful Blogger awards!)

Alexis - from The Swensen Family.  She is gorgeous and real - she speaks honestly and I love all the pics she shares of her ever shrinking self!  She and her hubby are such a cute couple and she's done so very well!  She also lives in a beautiful part of Pacific Northwest - I miss not getting to travel there for work anymore.  I miss The Pink Door restaurant! :)

Dinnerland - She is doing such a great job!  She really is determined and that's inspiring!  She writes well and I appreciate the detail.  I learn a lot from her posts because I can relate to them.

LapbadGalsjourney- She's lost 60lbs already!  She posts a lot of pictures - most recently of her airplane seat belt success!  Great job!

Yana in New York - Girl Meets Band - she just got banded in December and is already knocking out goals - keep up the great work!

Robyn at Improving Life - She's also recently banded.  She is dealing with some new issues in her life which makes it hard when you're a stress eater (like me).  She's going to be really successful!

Thanks again Sarah - you're really made my day!

I worked out this week!

I'm still on the bandwagon - the exercise one!  That alone is great news for me.  I did what I said I'd do and that's find time to work out this week.  It wasn't easy - but gosh - it felt great to have done it.  To have accomplished it, I mean.  My back and shoulders hurt most - because I'm so tense when I work out it causes my shoulders to cinch up and I get tension headaches from it.  I need to remember to relax my shoulders when I'm walking and jogging. 
I need to work out today to finish the week strong and also work out tomorrow (Sun) to start the week off right!  I did lose 2lbs - those 2 wierd lbs that hovered up are now back down.
I am excited to go with my sister and friends to Charlottesville this Tuesday evening to see the currently controversial John Mayer.  Its going to be great!  I honestly thought that I would be in the 190's and my goal was to be in the 180's by this concert.  But I didn't work out so I sat on this plateau until I did what I know I need to.  Work out!

How am I going to work in time to exercise this week?

Monday starts a new workweek and a challenge for when I'm going to work exercise into my day.  I didn't get up at 5am to workout so that means I've got to either do on my lunch hour or when I get home tonight.  Lunch is more realistic but it will mean I have to stay at work longer since working out 45 min at lunch means I'll be gone from the office for an hour and 15mins.
I made fish and a good salad last night.  I'm bringing the leftover salad to work and plan on eating a bananna and coffee for breakfast.  I also brought yogurt as a snack.  I sure hope I can keep my eating on track today and avoid brownies and chocolate chip cookies that DH made. 
I've got such tension in my shoulders which is causing me bad headaches.  I know this is a result of how I run - I need to relax more and be conscious of it.  I've also got my ipod with me which will count my steps all day today.  I do look forward to uploading the data afer each workout.  I easily do 5000 steps when I do the treadmill for 45min.  That is positive reinforcement for me. 
How many of you have the bodybugg and is it worth it?  I'd love to know your thoughts on that!  Its expensive and I know some people swear by them.  But what are the advantages over say, the ipod pedometer that I have?  Would love to know your thoughts!
The sun is finally out here - after many gray winter days!  I can't wait to wear flip flops!!!

This is a cake, by the way.  How cute is that?  From this site.

Worked out again - feels good!

It feels good to have that accomplished.  Its always rough at first but it felt good to work out some of the soreness from my muscles.  I ran for 10 mins of the 45 - the rest I walked on an incline.  Knees don't feel as bad as they did the first time.  I listened to a craftsanity podcast interviewing a knitting designer I like a lot the whole time which is a change of pace for me.  I know - boooring for most - but its interesting for me!  I did complete knitting booties and a cute little hat for someone who recently had a baby at work.  It felt good to accomplish something with my hands instead of with my brain.  A tangible result of work completed.
On the eating front: I can't believe I blew it last night eating.  Nachos with cheese did me in.  This after making myself broiled salmon with steamed asparagus while the kids ate pizza.  Not sure why I fell off the wagon like that - I was feeling stressed b/c of the kids and frustrated that I hadn't worked out yesterday. 
I'm going to eat the other half of the salmon with the rest of the asparagus for lunch.  I don't know why I crave cheese all the time.  cheese and crackers, nachos with cheese, blue cheese on my salad, grilled cheese.  Its really nuts.  I know I get enough protein, so its not that.  And I never really was a big cheese person before. 

I finally got so sick of myself, I actually worked out!

You know when you get to that place where you're so sick of your own excuses that you actually do what you need to do?  That happened yesterday.  I know that the most important thing holding me back for weight loss right now is my lack of commitment to working out.  I came home early from work and found myself starting to do 'lower priority' things - when I knew I had the time to work out.  You know when you do other meaningless stuff because you're avoiding the thing you should be doing?  That was me yesterday.   I even found myself looking for something to eat.  I need to start saying 'no' and it started with closing the pantry door.
Sick of making the same bad choices, eating something small and meaningless, and finding all kinds of reasons why I don't have time to work out - I charged up my ipod, and hopped right on the treadmill and worked out for 45 mins.  I even was able to run - but my knees started hurting - so I backed off.  I uploaded my workout  from my ipod into nikePlus and seeing it online made me feel accomplished.   And dare I say..... I actually enjoyed it?  I enjoyed accomplishing it.  Doing the right thing and not snacking! 
So, I'll be setting some goals today - how many times per week I will be doing cardio on the treadmill.  I need to get myself re-connected with my personal trainer and I need to download some new music (my sister has some great music I may try to copy from her instead of spending $$)!

On the savings plan update - I must tell you all that I am doing a very good job with my new budgeting plan and have met all my savings goals thus far.  My goals are pretty aggressive as I get ready to be laid off in about a year.  The latest date for me is March 2011 - that date keeps moving based on some legal issues with the closing of sales with the two companies buying portions of the big company I work for.  So its been a moving target.  Anyway, knowing the sacrifices I'm making now to meet my budget goals in a year is for a specific date really makes my choices easy.  I never realized how much money I was wasting on things just to make myself feel better because I work so hard and have a high stress job.  I am amazed at just how eating out less saves us so much money.  I'm amazed at how its the little things, not the big things, that make the difference.  I don't feel like my lifestyle has changed much I just have made small decisions like going to my sister for 'free' copies of her music vs. going to itunes and buyings some good workout downloads. 
The lesson in this for me is that its the single task of  TODAY's workout, not the big goal of losing the next 60lbs that I need to focus on.  We all know this - its nothing new - but I just have to keep reminding myself that all I have to do is work out today and not worry so much about tomorrow.  Just get it out of the way and stop making excuses!  So, when will I find time today to work out?  I have the kids by myself today - and my 3 yr old always wants to hop on the treadmill or talk to me and ask questions while I'm trying to work out.  Its ridiculous.  That's the challenge for today.......I'll let you guys know how I figure it out!

I'm back

I really need to refocus on the weightloss, specifically the working out part.  Not news to anyone in the battle to weightloss!  I don't want to get another fill because I think I'm fine where I am, except that I can eat a little more than I think I'm supposed to.  I'm making poor choices and I know a fill isn't necessarily going to solve that.  I am recommitting to exercise because I know that is the key to getting this whole thing to work.  I've done it before and I'm going to do it again!
My big problem has really been trying to get the good veggies in, like broccoli, salads, carrots, etc.  I tend to go for the easy stuff that is quick and won't get stuck and that's what's landing me in trouble.  I end up eating cheese, peanut butter and other carbs that are soft and quick and easy to get down.   Its still a matter of choice and I am committing to making good choices.  It requires planning and that's actually what I'm lacking.  At least I know what to focus on! :)
I can see that everyone out there is really doing a great job with the weight loss!  I'm so impressed by everyone's successes!  Can't wait to catch up on everyone's blogs!