Running again - its hard but feels so great!

Went to Talbots today - they're having a 40% off sale btw - and went to the rack of size 14 pants.  I still can't believe that I can wear a size 14 off the rack and not just get lucky with a generously cut pair of pants that happens to have a size 14 label inside.  I bought some slim cut jeans and some other pants.  I'm also realizing that I have a big butt.  I've always had some junk in the trunk, but when you're heavier, it all just kinds of blends in, you know, everything is big.  Now that I'm revealing a shape, I'm realizing I have a big butt.  Proportionately, a big butt.  Actually, I'm kind of glad about that.  Because that means, when I get to my goal weight, I'll still have some butt on me, which I think looks good on a woman.  Personally, I like women with strong legs and some junk back there.

Hmmm, do we have a type?  I mean I guess we do have a preference for or a type that we'd 'like' to look like if it was really a choice and genetics didn't play a role.  I don't want to look skinny - I want to look shapely and athletic.  I also like women who have great shoulders and defined biceps.  That, my friends, is definitely NOT in my genetics.  Won't happen no matter what I do.  But that's ok.  I build muscle really easily in my legs and I have great legs!  Just think what they'll look like when I'm 40 lbs lighter and am running like I'm supposed to!

New Years plans around here keep changing.  We're supposed to go to an invitation only party at one of my favorite oceanfront restaurants/bar.  One couple in our small group has already bowed out - party poopers!!  The other 3 are still hanging in.  I also still need to get a sitter.....

I ran today on the boardwalk.  It was a gorgeous 50-60 degrees today.   Its really tough when you get back started into running.  I ran only 3.5 miles and had to stop for some 30-60 second walk breaks - about 5 times.  I can't wait for the day when you get to the point where you feel like you can run forever.  Its such an awesome feeling when you get there.  I know it won't take me long - as long as I'm consistent.  I just cannot tell you how great that is.  You feel so powerful and content and strong!  Its AWESOME!!

Right now the scale says, 190 - I'm up 6-8 lbs - I'm looking forward to those long 5-8-10 mile runs so that I can also torch some calories and get these pounds off!

 I also stopped at the new lululemon store on the way home, had some starbucks, then met my husband and daughter for sushi for a late lunch.  After that we took the kids to the movies - and saw Sherlock Holmes.  It was entertaining for sure.  I liked it!   What a wonderful day!

I hope you all are have a great weekend too!
 

Wow - its been a while since I posted

I can't believe its been so long since I've been to my own blog.  I actually have missed reading about everyone and the whole community.  It started back when I had to miss my flight to Boobs Chicago in October because my son broke his arm.  It kind of all unraveled from there and I withdrew from blogland.  Mostly because I was living life in only a few hours per day because I have been so busy with my new job.  Much to my dismay, this job - perhaps because its new and I have so much to learn about the pharmaceutical industry - has really sucked up my time.  If you all remember, I took severance from my job in telecommunications after 17 years in pursuit of a job with less stress and more flexibility.  Sometimes, you just don't know until you try it.  So, I got this job 2 weeks after I ended my prior job and it turns out this job is pretty high pace and personal time consuming.

I've made the decision, to not stay, but instead work for a year and half and save for a tummy tuck, pay off the house, and to be able to quit and actually take time off this time around.  Then I want to take a job that doesn't require so much time away from my family, or perhaps start a business of my own.

After I ran the half marathon in September, I hadn't run/exercises since.  Only sporadically.  I was literally coming home from work at 7pm and so mentally exhausted I just didn't have time and was too tired to find the time.  I've only gained about 5 lbs, which I think is great considering how poorly I was stress eating.

I've begun a 10 week training plan again.  Six months into my new job, I'm learning where and how I can work in running again.

Mr. Coconuts and I just got back from a week in Mexico - a few weeks ago.  It was just what I needed to slow down again.  And it was GORGEOUS!  Turquoise water, warm sunny weather, and a swim up bar!    The best part was that the last time I was in Mexico, 3 years ago, I was 50 pounds heavier.  It was so nice to feel so much better about how I looked and felt this time.  I'm looking forward to next time and losing even more!  I can believe what a big difference 50lbs makes.  Its a world of difference!

I finally got the quartz countertops installed.  Almost finished painting the cabinets.  So stuff around the house is also getting done.

I sure hope all of you are doing well!  I am looking forward to finding balance and catching up on your blogs.  I'm also looking forward to running another half in March as well as training between now and then to get to that point where I can run it with ease!

Boobs questions!

1. How did you pick your blog name? 

I love things tropical - and seem to have a trend of coconut related items that somehow thread through my life (coconut cupcakes, coconut rum, coconut trees) and I also have a penchant for things that are cozy.  I love candles, fireplaces (with crackling fires), knitting blankets, a warm mug of coffee - I had simply noticed a that I love things are are comforting or cozy.  So I just came up with "the cozy coconut"  I realize now that everyone misreads it and some still think it says crazy coconut - whatever -that works! 

2. When did you start blogging? Gosh, it was a long time ago....2004 maybe?  I've had knitting blogs, personal blogs, none have lasted as long as this one.   

3. Theme of blog: 
This blog began after I got my surgery.  I was afraid and felt alone in my decision and needed to connect.  The beginning for me was really hard - I didn't have success right away.  It was reading so many great blogs that I learned what to do and what to expect.  You all also inspired me and I decided I wasn't going to be a failure at this, so I decided I was going to be the exception to the rule.  The person who loses weight AFTER the first year where you "lose all the weight" you're likely going to lose.  I've truly been an exception, losing 50lbs so far. :) 

4. Did you go to BOOBs 2010? No, I wanted to but couldn't due to my job.  

5. When were you banded? March 9, 2009.

6. How much have you lost? 50lbs!  I'd like to lose 35 more lbs and get to 150!

7. What are you most looking forward to at BOOBs? 
I can't wait to meet all you celebrities.  I think all of you are celebrities and a really amazing group of people.  You all are clearly fun and so am I!  LOL we're going to have an AMAZING time.
8. What/who do you hope to find/see/accomplish at BOOBs 2011?  

I hope to feel inspired again - like everyone always does for me - and use it to fuel my focus to lose these last 30 lbs.  I also hope to make new friendships and get to know people better than I do today.

9. Children? Pets? 2 kids, one boy, one girl.  No pets that are mine.  Son has a mini wiener dog and fish.

10. Who is your roomie? The amazing Linda and Read.  I absolutely can't wait to meet them.

11. What day do you arrive? I arrive on Friday, I have to work, and can't take any more days off b/c I'm so new to the job. 

12. What airport/flight/time?  I'm flying into ORD, at 630pm. 

13. What events are you signed up for? 
I haven't signed up for anything yet.  Guess I should do that. 
14. Hobbies? 
I am enjoying running - is it a hobby if you like it and exercise if you don't? I am REALLY good at making drinks, my friends love for me to bar tend.  I make up awesome shots and martinis.  Sometimes they're amazing, sometimes they're not.  But most of the time, they're great successes! I love to be on the ocean whether its just cruising or fishing.  I like to knit and I actually make home made soaps and body cream, body scrub.  Its physically and mentally therapeutic for me.....Oh, and I've recently began SUP!  Stand Up Paddle boarding!  Its really AWESOME!
15. Career? 
Career - hmmm - I'm the director over a help desk that supports the pharma industry.  I don't consider it a career, because my plan has been all along to work hard, save a lot, and stop doing it in  about 3 years from now.
16. Single? Married? In a relationship? Married 

17. Your birthday month? June

18. What do you want other BOOBs to know about you? 

I'm not the most consistent blogger - I am honest and put it all out there - I just hope that people know who I am because I certainly know and admire all of YOU! :)
 

Slacker!

I can't believe its been this long without my posting anything - I'm such a slacker!! Gettting back from CA Sunday near midnight and turning right around and leaving for NJ at 8am the next morning plus jet lag really threw me for a loop. I had so much to catch up on at the new job after being gone for a week, plus lost time and work piling up from being in NJ on business. Not to mention that I needed to train for my half marathon last weekend AND my master's program semester ended 8/31. Whew - its was NUTS. Oh yeah, and an earthquake and a hurricane that hit us directly here in Va Beach. I swear - did the rapture really happen and we're all just still left here? But we didn't realize it before now? What's next? Locusts? Sheesh. Makes me all nervous about 12/21/12 now.....you know, the end of the world and all.
Well, I did catch up on work, our house survived and I did complete the half marathon! woot! It was great but I was slow. At least I really did run the whole thing which was my goal. I'm going to work on getting faster next. Right after my toenails fall off. Seriously. I think my toenails are going to fall off again, like the did the last time I walked the half marathon 2 years ago. My toenails hurt so much still that I just know its going to happen and it totally sucks. I bought the right shoes and everything - I think I didn't tie them tight enough so my foot wouldn't slide forward. They were a full size larger than I normally wear - just so this wouldn't happen. I also had my shoes professionally fitted - so this wouldn't happen. Oh well! At least its not Summer and my toes will be hidden most of the winter. Last time it took a full year - 12 complete months - for my big toe to grow back and look the normal length again. I'm going to get that shirt up there!

[Image]I am registered for a 10K in October and another half in the Outer Banks (yep the place that was nearly washed away from Irene) in November. Hope all of you are doing GREAT! I miss everyone!

Darn Drew Cary hurt his shoulder.....

I was excited to surprise you with my trip to the game show - "The Price is Right" yesterday.  We had tickets in hand, got to the CBS studios at 6:30a.m., waited in line with coffee and bagels, got on the lot, gave up our names, personal info, etc (in case we won a big prize), got our official 'infamous' name tags, got official photos taken for the show's producers, went through the interview (where you show as much energy as possible), and waited outside the studio itself about to go in and the show's announcer and producer (his real name is Adam Sandler-but not THE Adam Sandler) came out and announced that Drew Carey had hurt his shoulder and wouldn't be able to do the show today or tomorrow!

There were 300 pretty pissed off people who had all gone though this process - so many people who had made T-shirts, etc. all so upset b/c there would be no taping.  Phooey!!  I really wanted to see the show, and possibly be ON the show!

I'm so disappointed!  Oh well....

I drove to Laguna Beach - and the water is just the most amazing deep aqua blue color.  The waves crash a bright white too - its just so gorgeous against the deep blue color of the Pacific. Here's a few pics of the surfers I took with my cell phone:

I also visited some great yarn stores - I share a love of knitting with Tina!  Anyway - look at the colors! 

I did go running 6 miles this morning on Venice beach - the original Muscle Beach!  I need to bring my cell phone and take some pics for you guys.  Just 2 days ago, I ran down Wilshire avenue and passed the Playboy studio - that white one they featured on the show "The girls next door" all the time.  Think for a moment about looking at yourself in the reflection of the Playboy studios window and thinking about how you look in your running gear and no make up! Ha! Ha!  I wonder why they didn't stop me on the street as I ran by?! LOL....

This is a pic of the beach right outside of the hotel room we booked last night.  My sister's house is getting full as my other sister and her daughter flew out last night.  Today, my best friend is joining us so we decided to just split a hotel room for the rest of the week.

Anyway, I'll take some pics today and post them - I know I need to do a little more of that!

Wa Wa What? Has it really been 15 days since I've posted anything?

Oh my goodness!  What is wrong with me?  I'm still here, promise!

First,  SO VERY COOL to be the featured boob of the day!  Thank you Linda for taking the time to write something for me and to everyone else who left such kind comments!  How neat is that??!!

I've been working like crazy and been quite a bit stressed about it.  I've been feeling guilty about not balancing my home life - I feel like I've not been spending enough time with my kids and it makes me feel like I'm always borrowing from another part of my life to make up for the shortcomings in the other.  Its a viscous circle that I need to gain control over.  For example, I leave work early so that I spend some quality time with my kids - makes me feel a bit guilty about not working late/getting things done.   I'm stealing from work time in order to spend time with my kids.  Or another example is that I skip spending time with my kids so I can go running.   I need to do all of those things: run, spend quality time with my family/kids, and work hard at the new job.   I know its a balancing act - but I feel like I'm constantly stealing time from one important area of my life to feed the other.  And I just end up feeling guilty whatever I do.  Sheesh!  The answer is that I can't allow work to consume me.

My running has definitely been suffering as I only have been running on Saturdays in the prior 2 weeks.  Saturday before last, I ran 7 miles and walked 6 so I could see what the half marathon (13 mi) was going to really feel like.  I think it was a mistake as I was so sore for a few days after that!

Right now I'm in California - visiting my sister.  I've run everyday except today (scheduled rest day) and its been fantastic.  I feel so much better mentally and physically.  I can't tell you all how much running makes me feel better mentally.  It makes me feel more in control somehow.  Today I drove to Laguna Beach - and wow it was just amazing!  The water was so aqua blue and I just loved watching the surfers catching waves.  The weather here is just amazing.  The lack of humidity is heaven.  So unlike Virginia right now!

I have a fun surprise for you all tomorrow.....you're never going to guess where I'm going!  Can't wait to tell you all about it!

8 mile run! Woot! New record!!

With the assistance of a treadmill and climate controlled AC, I completed my Saturday 8 mile run!  Can you believe it?  I ran 8 miles without stopping??!!??  That also means I burned about 800 calories! Yippee!!
5 more weeks until my half marathon - still not sure if I'm going to be able to make it to run 13 miles without stopping - if I add a mile a week between now and then, I'll be able to do it.  But I can definitely feel the achy-ness in my feet and legs now.  I hope things don't start to fall apart for me physically now - I'm a little worried about that.  My pace is still 11min miles - so 8 miles takes me about an hour and a half to complete.
I'd previously signed up for a 10K (6.2 miles)  in October - that's going to feel easy compared to this 13.1 miler!  Heck, I'm running 10K's a few times a week now! (big smile!)

I've not posted in a week because I've been so busy at work.  I can't believe how much of your life our jobs suck away!  I had my boss and some vendors in town as we move toward purchasing some new software to take our business to create a self help website and also provide live chat.  I also went to a sublime and 311 concert on Wednesday that was SO FUN!  This week I'm going to go see Maroon 5 and Train - we have 5th row seats and I'm so excited b/c its going to be an awesome time!

I'm tracking my food on myplate.com consistently and am doing better managing my stress eating at work.  I really wanted to lose 10 pounds this month - and joined the boobs challenge to try to incent myself to do it.  Scale says 185 today, so I only lost 5 lbs.  Dang it.  I'd LOVE LOVE LOVE to break into the 170's and get to 179 by August 31st.   I just can't imagine what that would feel like.  What would I look like if I weighed 170?  That's 15 lbs from where I am now.  I bet it would make such a HUGE difference.  The 10 lbs from 195 to 185 were a major difference in my size!  Weighing more than that I didn't notice so much.

I'm way, way behind in my graduate classes and have to turn up the heat between now and August 31.  I have to complete 2 full classes in this time frame due to my procrastination. I'll figure it out and find a way to make it happen.  I also have to decide if I want to continue.  I'm just not that into it and the new company does not pay for school like my previous employer.  I have a decision to make this Fall.  Oh gosh, did I just say Fall?  Curses!  There will be no talk of that while I'm still living in my Summer Dreamland!

I'm shocked, I actually like what I see

I inadvertently looked in the bathroom mirror tonight after trying to clean the sink of dried toothpaste and other messes my kids left behind.  I caught a glimpse of myself and saw that my face it just a little thinner.  I looked at my chest and neck and jawline.  I saw my shoulders and upper body in such a way that I've not seen in a very, very long time.  I saw the potential me emerging out from behind the old me!  I can't tell you guys what has changed exactly, but I can see that if I can continue down this path of fat loss and muscle gain, I can really do something with my body and feel happy about what I see.  To like what I look like an perhaps not cringe each time I see the reflection of myself in the mirror or in pictures.  Have I turned a corner?  Am I jinxing myself?

I remember one time catching my reflection in the rear view mirror as I sat in the passenger seat of the Tahoe while my family and were driving somewhere....I remember the shock of seeing my face, so big and swollen and ugly.  I didn't recognize myself and was surprised thinking "Is that what I look like?  Is that what other people see?"  I was so embarrassed and ashamed of what I looked like.  Today was a day like that only - I saw myself and thought "I really AM losing weight"  "I don't look horrible"  "Maybe I can really do this"  What a wonderful feeling.  I had to stop what I was doing and come and type this.  I'm feeling exciting that if I can keep this going, I can really become the person I've always wanted to be physically.  I've gotta get things going, have to get the losses moving along.  I really, really want to accomplish this.  I want to feel proud of the way my body looks physically strong.    And that's WAY cool......

THIS is HARD!!

Set my alarm for 4:30am b/c the training schedule called for 5 miles today.  I'm exhausted mentally from the overwhelming load of new information and critical nature at my new job (8 days in) which I know is making me more physically tired.  I also have a looming Aug deadline for grad school work that I've fallen way behind in.  I'm saying all this to paint the picture as to why I didn't want to get up at 4:30a.m.  I am TIRED.  So I hit snooze a couple of times and lived in that half awake, have asleep state until I finally got my butt up around 5:20am.  I got dressed, went outside, and its so humid all my windows in my house are fogged up.  Seriously.  I realized I was never going to make it to the beach, spend the 60 mins I needed to run the 5 miles today and get back by 6:15am when my husband leaves for work.  UGH - the dilemma!

I ended up going back in the house and running on my treadmill.  I was feeling so un energetic that I only set my ipod for 30 mins b/c I really didn't think I could make it past that.  The first 20 mins just are hard, body feels heavy, my boobs are sore (pms?), blech.  After 20 mins, I'm feeling better, knees feel better, I feel smoothed out.  Running isn't hurting and my heart/lungs feel good.  So I keep going and get to my 5 miles in  60 mins.  NICE!  I was on my treadmill, in the AC, and I still SWEAT like crazy.  It actually made me feel accomplished.  I've noticed the more I run, the earlier in the run I'm sweating.  And I'm sweating more.   Wonder why that is?

Anyway - here I am - with my proud sweat.  No make up, making a silly face  (I'm just not that good at making serious faces), and my vitamin zero water, lemonade flavor.  Sweetened with stevia so there is no sugar/splenda either.  I'm hooked on this stuff.

What I wore Wednesday!

Ok, so I've learned that I need to get better light and take the picture in the morning before I leave instead of when I get home.  That being said, this is what I wore today!

Ok, I got my butt up this morning EARLY - and ran for 45 mins at my favorite place - the beautiful oceanfront  - 4 miles - as part of my running program.  I probably burned 500 calories.

I wore my running shoes...see?  I like Brooks tennis shoes b/c my feet are wide!

Now for work.....since I've lost some weight, I can wear:
 a size L - crinkle cotton top from Talbots - 29.00 on sale
Butter soft beautiful silk blend pants, Talbots - 36.00 marked down from 129.00

Yucky pic - haha!  I look so silly!

Cute heels that are comfortable b/c I weigh less - don't remember where I bought them or how much.

I'd love to see what y'all are wearing these days as you slim down, get more fit, and look gorgeous doing it!!

Tomorrow I have to get up at 4:30am - so I can run while its cooler (not cool, just cooler than 190 degrees).  I'm scheduled for 5 miles tomorrow a.m.  No problem!

What I wore Wednesday! Idea for blog post

I'm thinking about posting 'what I wore' on Wednesday every week.  As I'm losing the weight, I'm enjoying wearing new things and liking how I look in them.  I always love the pics your posts so I thought I'd start tomorrow and post "what I wore" that day.

 This is my little busy bee underwater!

 This is me and my little busy bee on our pool day!

This is me and Mr Coconuts - doing shots - ugh.

I went to go run this afternoon - at the track- and they flipping cancelled it after I nearly broke my neck to get there.  Would have been nice for them to let me know!  Not sure where the communication breakdown was but I had to drive a long way to get there and now I'm not getting my work out in.  I'm losing my grip on my workout schedule and need to get a grip quick!  I also am eating MUCH MORE now that I am back at work.  I KNOW its stress eating.  I have loaded up the freezer at work with green giant steamers and greek yogurt.  I just can't seem to STOP eating.  So crazy that I'm aware of it and my behavior has changed since returning to work.  Its a work in progress and I'm going to figure this out and fix it.  Not exactly sure how yet...but I'm going to!!

First week at new job, ehhh...

Its been an interesting week.  I started my new job and spent most of the week with my VP.  It was only Friday that I was by myself and could take a breath.  Its going to be an interesting ride, that's for sure.  Lots to fix but that's also a lot of opportunity.  An interesting aspect of working for this company is that since it is French owned, the culture difference among company policies are going to be an issue. Specifically when it comes to pay practices, promotions, and pay equity.  Without boring you with details, it jacked up and needs to be leveled out among the workforce.  Anyway, I'm boring myself talking about it!  haha!

Right now, I'm sitting in the passenger seat of our Tahoe traveling home from Albemarle, NC.  (I just love using my cell phone as a MIFI hotspot that I can connect wirelessly to the Internet using my laptop - while we're driving - SO COOL!)   The kids spent the weekend with my in laws giving Mr. Coconut and I time alone.  We're pulling a new boat we just bought behind us home!  We've had the same boat since before we got married and have loved it, it was just time to get something new and easier to maintain.  We purchased one of those all white boats with the center console - that all you have to do is wash down and hose it off!  No fancy paint to fade in the sun, no fancy upholstery to have to replace, no carpet to replace.  Our old boat had all of that and while it was nice, we really wanted something that was just easy and a little bit bigger.  We bought it off a man who lives on the Currituck sound - the same one that connects the outer banks to the 'mainland'.  Its going to be fun and we're really going to enjoy this boat.  :)

I spent yesterday morning running SEVEN, yep, SEVEN!!! miles without stopping!  Woooooooooooot!  I'm adding about a mile a week and I feel really good.  I am constantly amazed that my legs can carry me that far and I'm not totally worn out.  I love the fact that my body is responding and is so strong and capable.   I got on the scale this morning and I weigh 187.  So I'm up a pound from last week, but I'm really liking that my thighs look more an more toned.  I went 4 days without running last week due to the new job - but I got myself out there Thursday night at 8:30 pm and ran for an hour and 10 mins because I KNEW I had to GET IT DONE!    Christine gave me some sage advice and said to get my exercise routine IN PLACE NOW and not wait.  She's so right!  I can already tell my eating habits are suffering.  I'm very busy this first week and I find myself eating when I have time vs. when I'm hungry.  I may have 4 hours of back to back meetings and I know if I don't eat at noon, I won't be eating for 4 hours.  That's what I'm working on.  I really learned my body's natural rhythm for eating and I like to eat at 11am and 3pm.   I've been eating at noon and then I'm starving at 3pm and want to eat all kinds of bad stuff!

I have found a gym that is not to far that I plan to go to during my lunch hour.  I am determined to take a lunch break!  I'm going to make it a priority!  I want to lose 10 lbs this month and its already the 17th!  I've only lost 3.  I'm going to start weight work next week when I join the new gym close to my work, maybe that will help me....

Scale has said 186 for 2 days in a row now.. .

shhhh. I don't want to say it too loudly and scare it away.....today I woke up to a 2nd day at 186.0.  From here down its officially all new records for me weight-wise.  I haven't been in the 180's for almost 10 years.  Wow.  Is this really happening?   Just last Sunday- a week ago -  I was so frustrated b/c the stupid scale said 191 and now its 186?  Has to be crazy water weight combined with hopefully some actual fat loss!

I didn't run yesterday and today was supposed to be a rest day.  I've not run or exercised since Saturday's AWESOME 70 mins without stopping run!  And GEN if you're reading this, thanks for popping out of your sabbatical to shoot me some messages of encouragement.  I really appreciate it.  I hope you get the chance to come back soon because you're greatly missed!

Today was my first day on the job, thanks for the well wishes Christine!  It was really uneventful and LOOOONG.  I like my boss, like the people I'll be working with, like my new office, like my paycheck!  I don't like feeling like my day is gone and all night is spend preparing for the next work day.  I'm struggling fitting working out into my workday and today at work I was starving b/c I didn't preplan and bring anything healthy to eat or drink.  I had a salad at lunch and it just didn't tide me over and I was starving at 6pm on my drive home.  This is how I didn't lose any weight before.  I've lost 17lbs in 3 months - much of my progress was when I was out of work and had my whole day to eat and work out when my body wanted it/needed it.  Its so easy to see how you can stop listening to your body b/c you're busy at work and stuck on conference calls or stuck in a 'schedule' versus listening to your body.

I know when I was off, I didn't eat breakfast until about 11 am, lunch around 3pm and a late dinner made me feel best.  If I was going on an early run, I'd also eat toast/almond butter beforehand to help me with a long run.  I'm going to try to stick to this schedule and listen to my body.  My body definitely settled into its own rhythm since I was off and I don't want to lose that.  I don't want my work brain to take over my awareness/present moment brain which I tend to very easily to.  I make my body fit into my work schedule and not my work schedule around what I'm feeling.  I have the luxury to be able to do that and I'm going to take advantage of it!

Clothes ARE changing - I can feel it!!

You all know how frustrated I've been because I'm doing all the right things by exercising consistently and eating right.  No changes on the scale, in fact it went up a few times, and no changes in my clothes.  I'm ok if the scale doesn't move as long as my clothes do!  I would love to think that all this running is making me replace fat with muscle, but the scale nor clothes haven't changed in 4 weeks.  And that's a long time!

Well, I put on my size 14 shorts last and they felt just a little lose.  So I put on my tighter 14's - and they fit me better than normal.  I tried on a few other tighter clothes and they don't feel as tight.  That's how I KNOW my size is changing and that makes me very happy!  Its very subtle, but its something!!I just had to report this to you guys!

You know, its not until I wrote this that I realized this what seems like an 'overnight' change in my clothes coincides with an emotional settling I've experienced in the last day.  I recently had a situation that I was able to come to peace with just recently in my own heart and mind - is it possible that our mental stress/situations can influence or physical weight loss?  I don't think so, but its a strange coincidence....

Also check out my last run over there to the left!  I ran yesterday morning on a really beautiful trail through a park at the beach.  I ran for 70 minutes without stopping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  That covered about 6.2 miles!  I'm half way through my training program for the Rock and Roll half marathon here in Virginia Beach in September and I'm so proud of my progress!  I've not given up and no injuries.  Usually, at this point, I give up or fail at eating well.  I've not done either and its so rewarding!!

I also have to tell you one strange NSV.  I know you all will understand.  I looked down to my left and caught a glimpse of my shoulder.  It looked so different because it looked like an actual shoulder meaning there was a front and a back to my shoulder - and not a big 'ol rounded bunch of flab that resembles a shoulder.  I know that sounds odd, but I couldn't stop looking at it.  I don't have pronounced shoulders or collar bones and I'm really thick through my boobs, upper back and shoulders.  This gave me such a glimmer of hope!

Oh!  One last thing to update you on "the guy." that you all gave such great advice on.  Well, my best friend, she didn't text him at first but then she decided that she really wanted to say her peace at the expense of losing her dignity. She said she didn't care and did it for her self, so she did.  She basically sent a kind text that said she 'got' the ended communication and that she appreciated the encounter and wished him well.  She said she said it much more eloquently and it made her feel more in control of the situation for herself.  She didn't want to leave him with the thought that she was heartbroken - she said she didn't want him to have that.  She felt by sending the text she was left with control for herself over it all.  Well, after about 15 days, he texted her back.  He apologized for the 'lack of communication' said he did it b/c his phone died and he turned off all media (facebook, tv, email, phone) to clear his head.  He said he appreciated her too and agreed with everything she said and ended his text with "life's a blessing and so is every type of relationship we have. I hope all is well with you my Galina (his nickname for her) - Blessings!"  Anyway, that is that and she feels much better she said.  She's also started dating 2 other guys - but she's still hung up on this one but is able to let it go b/c as I told her - he's just not that into her.   I don't think he's trying to get back in touch with her.  I think he just felt guilty and this allowed him to clear HIS conscience.  At least its all over for her and she can move on!

I start my new job tomorrow!  I'm excited but I'm also really focused on trying to figure out a way to make a solid impression and KEEP balance in  my life!  I want to be successful but also keep the things in my life that have brought me happiness like running, spending time at the beach, going out with friends, going out on the boat with my family - basically just making time for me and my family as a priority.

Wish me luck tomorrow!

Stupid Scale and tough workout yesterday!

I swear, I don't understand the scale.  I weighed myself b/c I'm taking part in the Boobs challenge, and the stupid thing says 191??!!  My clothes aren't changing and I'm doing a really great job with the calories.  I'm tracking my calories every day, staying within 1000-1100 per day.  I had increased my calories from 900 per day in order to try to jump start my weight loss..... I just don't get it.  The math just doesn't add up.  I'm  not exercising every single day, but I'm running consistently 4-5x per week and burning calories.  I do know I'm adding muscle to my legs from running, but my clothes aren't changing.  Its been 5 weeks of no change on the scale and no change that I can tell in my clothes.

I'd like to lose 2lbs per week in July OR just go down a pants size to a 12.  How am I going to do it?  What do I try next?  The only thing left, really is for me to exercise more.  And I mean more cardio.  I'd like to try a spin class and weights - I just don't know how I'm going to work it in my schedule with my new job.  I already am going to be gone a lot and adding exercise at the end of the day takes that much more time away from seeing my family at home.

Yesterday's interval training was TOUGH!!!!!!  This is what we did yesterday:
1.  1 mile "warm up" (warm up?  pulleze!  running is running!)
2.  Ran 1 mile at faster than goal pace = 11:30, rest 2 mins
3.  Ran 1/2 mile at faster pace = 10:40 mm:ss, rest 1 min
4.  Ran 1/4 mile at even faster pace = 9:45 mm:ss, rest 5 mins
5. DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN - yes, 1 mi, 1/2 mi, 1/4 mile.  I was DYING!
6.  1 mile "cool down"

That's a total of 5.5 miles when you add it all up with timed small breaks and running as hard as you possibly can.

Holy cow it was hard!  I was very uncomfortable - meaning - I really wanted to stop and walk and had to constantly battle my brain and body to keep myself from walking.  It was very mentally and physically challenging.  My lungs hurt from breathing so hard!  I was never so glad to be done and I slept so good last night b/c I was so darn tired out!

Its raining here today, so no beach day today.  So, I went to Talbot's today and bought a really beautiful black dress that is really slimming on me.  Its made so well - such nice quality - and will last for a long time.  I also got it on sale!  I plan to wear it to work.

My new job starts Monday and my new boss is flying in from NJ on my first few days.  So very nice of her.  I have no idea what I should wear - I'll post some pics and get some suggestions from you guys!

I also bought myself this Coach bag to use as my work tote.  I'll use it to carry my work papers, books, computer, etc. back and forth to work.  I got such a great deal on it and pick grey since its neutral and also picked patent leather b/c it will hold up to dirt/stains well since it will sit on the floor most of the time.  Here are a few pics I took of it.

NSV! 60 mins running without walking!!!

This is my little busy bee and husband across the table this morning at our favorite breakfast place. We can make a time wasting game out of stacking creamers!  Anything to keep her busy!

Not sure about you guys, but its pouring down rain here when we're supposed to be at a fireworks show at the beach.  We're not going b/c we planned to bike there and its just not happening in the rain tonight.

Anyway, about my NSV.....On Sunday, my running plan called for a long 60 min run at race goal pace.  My race goal pace is 12min per mile, which means that I plan to finish the 13.1 mile half marathon in 2 hours and 40 mins.  Well, on Sunday, I actually ran for 60 mins straight - without needing to stop and walk!!  I couldn't believe my legs and how strong I felt.  Often, I have a mental game with myself telling me to make it to that distant trash can or make it to "x" restaurant before I stop.  On Sunday I felt AMAZING!  I even checked my pace and I ran consistently at 11min30 sec mile pace - faster than goal!

I know the training is definitely helping me.  Remember, I couldn't run longer than 10 minutes without stopping!  You know how weak you are in the beginning of work out program that you've just begun?  How difficult it is and no one seems to understand or empathize exactly how hard it really is for you?  I feel like I'm getting past that now with running and its an incredible feeling.   I even complimented myself without realizing it - I thought to myself - "what strong and amazing legs I have that carried me this far and this long without pain or exhaustion."  Can you believe there was not a negative comment in my brain, but a compliment that came so effortlessly?  I know that running on the boardwalk with so many other people who are very old, or who have injuries, some even in wheelchairs out for a glimpse at the oceanfront early in the mornings make me appreciate the fact that I CAN move!  I think that each time I run past them and perhaps that's what brought that effortless positive thought about myself to my brain.  Or perhaps, it was just the fact that it was so FRICKIN AMAZING to me that I actually made it that far!!!  lol!

Had a nice weekend - pool party at a friends house.  Friday night out at the beach at a Tap House meant I got to try to some really great beers.  My favorite was a Sea Dog Blueberry Wheat ale.  It was smooth and fresh and great for a hot summer evening!  There was also a raspberry one that was fantastic.  This let me to purchase some Shocktop Raspberry ale and a Peach beer by Dogfish Head brewery.  The peach one was terrible, the Shocktop was ehhh, ok.  I think we'll definitely go back to that tap house and try new stuff.  They let you sample any and as many beers as you want and they have a lot of really unique ones.  Its a lot like wine tasting, actually, and I enjoyed it.  It was a lot of fun.

I have this last week before I start work on Monday....I'm going to have to really make this week great!  I hope to spend most of it on the beach!

Stuff I bought today & a cross dresser

I took my son to see Transformers today at the movies.  While I was there I visited the Coach store so I could see if they could send off one my purses for a repair on the handle.  A man who must be in transition to becoming a woman waited on me.  She is definitely in the beginning stages as she was still very masculine and so obviously a male in female clothing.  First, I have to say I was proud that Coach hired that person and hopefully did it knowingly.  I was really impressed also by how nice this man who is becoming a woman is and couldn't help but think how hard it must be.  I acted as if I didn't notice at all and probably was even more nice to her just because I felt sorry for her.  But do you know what I was most proud of?  My son.  He didn't even flinch or act like a typical 10 yr old boy and giggle or ogle her.  He didn't even seem to care even though I know he noticed it was clearly a man dressed as a woman.  That makes me proud that he just accepted this person as they were! :)  That's exactly how I want him to be and we, of course speak freely about those topics and I challenge him often on issues of equality.

Anyway, I also went to Nordstrom's today and found these Nike running shorts with the bike shorts built in.  I need to tack the shorts with a needle and thread to the running shorts so that the nylon running shorts on the outside don't bunch up in the crotch region and look stupid while I run!  I've been looking for shorts with built in biker shorts instead of built in underwear  online and everywhere and couldn't find them!  And the best part?  They were all out of XL's so bought the L and not the XL!!  How awesome is that??  They're snug but not so tight that I can't run in them.  I figure, the more I lose, they'll fit even better and it gives me something to use to measure myself with other than the scale.  :)

I also bought this new sports bra - by Zella today.  I absolutely cannot stand having a uniboob especially if I'm sweating. That is just the grossest thing to me ever.  While this doesn't have underwire, which I usually get b/c it keeps 'em separated, it has these cups built in that's supposed to the same thing.  I'll let you know how well it works.  I also really liked the bright pink lining inside!

The scale read 189 this morning and I haven't weighed myself in about 4 days.  Clothes aren't changing either, but I'm REALLLLLLY trying to be patient.

Today I ate:
bfast:  1/2 cup oatmeal, 1/4 cup blueberries and about 5 cashews
lunch:  Organic white tortilla chips and about a cup of blueberries (my snack I brought with me into the movie theater with my son to watch Transformers)
dinner:  4 cheese ravioli with homemade turkey vodka sauce.

I haven't worked out yet today and I really need to do some type of cardio today - my schedule calls for a 35 min easy run.  So, shortly, I'll head out and accomplish some cardio today as soon as it cools down outside!

Tomorrow is beach day.  Going to get an adjustment and massage at the chiropractor in the a.m., then meet my friend at the beach around noon to 3pm, then sit outside and enjoy an afternoon Orange Crush! I'm really trying to soak up and really enjoy my last few days of freedom before my new job begins!

Hey check out that milage! 8 miles Sunday!

Hey everyone!  See my update there on the left of my blog.  I went 8 miles Sunday! Woot!  Thanks Barbara for the shout out - I wish all this running my ass off would actually make my ass go away!

I ran the first 4 (with three 60 second breaks) and then I walked the entire second 4 miles.   I took the required break on Monday and today I ran the intervals again - which consisted of four 800 meter runs at a 10m15sec pace.  That's FAST for me and I sweated more than I have in a long time!

Today I used a Groupon and had my house cleaned.  Do any of you have your houses cleaned?  Why do I feel so guilty about doing it?  I swear, I cleaned the entire time they were here, too.  Its all part of my plan to de clutter my home.  I got rid of about 6 boxes of just stuff - clothes, books, candles, candle holders, purses, shoes, kid clothes, you get the idea.  I also threw away tons of old make up that was just taking up room.   Its a house CLEANSE!  I need to cleanse my spirit and cleanse my home!

Today I wasn't hungry at all.  I had to remind myself to eat.  I really enjoy not working because it allows me to eat when I actually feel like it.  This is a wonderful feeling!  I ate a few blueberries for breakfast, I ate some steamed shrimp, one grilled hot wing, and about 5 french fries with a beer for late lunch.  Then for dinner I had some leftover whole wheat pasta with onions, beef, carrot, zuchinni, tomatoes and garlic in a red wine reduction.  YUMMY!

I feel great that I worked out and as hard as it still is, I'm looking forward to this running getting easier....at least I'm hoping its going to!

Women and Stress - and a way to beat it

I liked this article below and wanted to share it with all of you.  I copied it from learnvest.com

I do think that visualization helps - but never thought to apply it in this manner.  I need to visualize myself running successfully, continuing to eat well balanced and nutritious diet, and I need to visualize the scale moving and/or my size changing! LOL.  Whatever helps, right?  I'm still a 14 -which I'm so very thankful for.  I just would love to be a 12!  I bought some new clothes at Talbot's yesterday and bought a pair of size 12 black pants that are going to be my goal pants for the next size!  What an accomplishment that will be!

I hope you all are having a wonderful weekend.  I've fallen off the exercise early wagon and need to get my butt in gear and hop back on !  I need to just flippin do it already.  

I'm taking Fluffy's advice and increasing my calories too.  I'm going to go with 1100 net calories after exercise is factored in.  Also buying a heart rate monitor so I can figure out more closely my calories burned.  Thanks again for the advice everyone!

I'm spending today getting rid of tons of clothes and shoes - de-cluttering is cleansing!!

An Easy Way To Beat Stress

Posted 7 days ago by Maria Lin

It’s confirmed: We’re stressed.

And we’re more stressed than men are.

According to the American Psychological Association’s (APA) 2010 Stress in America survey, most Americans are living with moderate or high levels of stress. And women are more stressed than men (28% report a very high level of stress, compared to 20% of men).

What tops our list of stressors? Surprise, surprise: Money. For 76% of Americans, money is the number one source of stress—above relationships, health, and personal safety.

If we could sum it up, we’d say: Mo’ money, mo’ problems. No money, mo’ problems.

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

The Stressed Gender?

We’re not sure why women are more stressed than men about money, but we can hazard a guess. First, women run 80% of household finances in America. We also tend to worry about problems more than men do (yeah, we have to do something about that).

It’s important to learn how to better manage stress, because stress has been linked to a variety of ailments, from mental health issues like anxiety and depression to physical illness, such as coronary disease.

Tackle The Problem

One way to handle money-related stress is to go straight to the underlying problem: those finances. At LearnVest, we firmly believe in taking control over your finances, which will allow you to sleep easily at night, no matter how much or how little you have (trust us, having a lot of money does not mean you won’t be stressed out about money—read about why the wealthy feel insecure and poor here).

But there is another way to manage stress that might be even more important…

Tackle The Stress

Studies show that our response to an event—the meaning and significance we attribute to it—is actually more important than the event itself in creating an emotional reaction. In other words, if someone steals our wallet, there is nothing we can do to change that fact. But we can change our feelings about it—and we have much more power over our own emotional reactions than we think.

Our response to an event is more important than the event itself in creating an emotional reaction.

A recent study out of the University of Denver and the University of Basel showed that the method ofcognitive reappraisal, or thinking about a situation in a more positive light, helps women change their emotional reactions to situations.

In the study, a group of 78 women from diverse backgrounds were shown a sad film clip. One group was left alone, and the other group was instructed to use the “cognitive reappraisal” method. The group that used cognitive reappraisal experienced much less negative emotion and stress than the other group (and they even measured this through physical skin conductance tests).

And according to the researchers, these results apply to our larger stressful life events as well.

How To Do It

So how exactly can we start taking this “silver lining” approach to life?

Get Rid Of Stress Now

Check out our Getting Out of Debt BootcampCLICK HERE

Below are the actual instructions given to the women in the study—try them for yourself and see if they help you diminish the stress in your life.

Try to think about the situation you see in a more positive light. You can achieve this in several different ways:

• Try to imagine advice you would give yourself to make you feel better.
• Think about the positive effect this event could have on your life.
• Think about the good things you might learn from this experience.
• Keep in mind that even though a situation may be painful in the moment, it could make your life better in the long run, or have unexpected good outcomes.

Think about it–maybe we can re-direct ourselves into stress-free living no matter our circumstances. (And we’re betting stress-free is the better way to tackle our circumstances anyway!)